As good as...

My mother made everything a competition when I was growing up. I know I've mentioned it before, but my mother used a "game" technique to get my brother, sisters and I to do the things we needed to do. Because I was second in the line of kids, most of my competitions were with my older brother. When it came to sports, I could rarely beat him, but when it came to him having to learn spelling words or his multiplication tables, I could win. My brother, a sports nut his whole life, needed motivation in school. He was smart, but just not interested. In order to make him do his homework, my mom devised ways to make it a game. Knowing that he was interested in football, she could get him to memorize grammatical rules if she could turn it into a football play. She also knew that if she could get him to compete with me, she could also coax him to learn things. So, consequently, I learned my multiplication tables a year early (since I was a grade behind him in school), and spelling words that were beyond my grade level. I could beat him in those games, and I loved it since I was never quite as good as him at throwing a ball into a basket or racing across the yard. This competitive spirit has stuck with me through the years. I'm not sure that's always a good thing.

What does this have to do with surfing (or running or cycling)? Well, one of the problems with being so competitive is the inability to just have fun sometimes. This week, the water was too rough and the weather too miserable to go surfing. With ESE gusty winds that turned to WSW winds, the surf report was rather dismal. According to G-townsurf.com, a couple of surfers braved the winds to go out, but you could tell they were a little more experienced than me and could dance around on the rough stuff. However, that's where my competitive spirit becomes an issue. When I don't go out, I feel like I'm stepping backward in my training. Yet, I'm not sure what that even means. If I'm surfing to just have fun, what difference does it make? Also, I have a bad habit of comparing myself to others. This can be rough for me, since some people are just more genetically gifted for certain sports that, perhaps, I'm not "designed" for. Surfing happens to be one of those sports. However, like many before me, I refuse to give up. I'm tall for a female surfer. Other tall surfers have succeeded though, so, really, what it means is that I just need to try harder. But, I have to try harder because I want it, and not because others are better at surfing than me. Let's face it, I will never qualify for professional "status" in any sport. 

This same competition problem comes into play with my other sports. I've been cycling for almost 20 years (wow! I just did the math in my head and I can't believe its been that long).  I cycle with a very competitive group of people, mostly guys. So, in years past, I've really pushed myself to be as fast and as strong as some of the guys cycling. And it's hard to tell just how strong a cyclist someone is by just looking at them. I've seen people who don't look particularly fit, ride strong and fast. The same goes for running, which is my newest sport. I go to runs and think I should be able to keep up with or pass certain other runners and then they leave me in their dust. In reality, it shouldn't matter. I'm doing it for fun, not for competition. My running friend M is very realistic about his running. He recently completed his first marathon, and has no great expectation that he will finish in a certain time. He sets a personal time for himself that has nothing to do with other runners. I ran in a half marathon this morning, forgot my Garmin, and then tried to stay with some 8:40 milers for the full 13 when, in reality, I should have just run my race and not thought about the time. Instead I let it bother me when they left me, as well as when another outstanding runner (a woman I know who was running her first half) passed me. Why shouldn't she beat me in? She trained properly, ate the right food the night before (I ate Mexican food last night, which is not exactly the right food for a run) and had the good sense to cycle yesterday with a slower group (not me; I left with my usual gang INTO A STRONG WIND).  She was particularly upbeat and positive for me when she passed; running for the love of it. (This reminds me of the book "Born to Run," which the author notes that the tribe he was following always smiled when they ran 'caused they loved to run.) 

I just need to remember to smile more when I'm surfing, cycling, running or just living. It's not a race!!!